Product Review: Clif products

Everybody knows Clif bars are tasty, nutritious, packed with all the minerals, salts, and carbs you need on longer rides.  However, one thing not everybody knows is that the bar inside every package is like a toy inside the cracker-jack box relative to the value of the wrapper, kind of like like how a Hummer is much more useful for commuting than off-roading, or looking good.

Semi-intended use.

Though Clif clearly intend their products to be consumed literally, they also endorse alternative uses:

Clif will actually pay for shipping of bulk quantities of wrappers, as well as $.02/bar for use of your trash, which is an excellent deal, given their multitude of other uses. In bike shops across the U.S. you can commonly find display trays and other gimmicks made from recycled Clif wrappers.

Better uses.

Everybody has heard of a friend using a wrapper as a boot for a slashed or blown out tire in a pinch, which it does a fine job for, but there are better uses:  Clif wrappers can provide more warmth than the calories of their contents.  In a pinch, a wrapper torn in half and tucked in the front of winter booties to block the wind and keep your toesies warm.  The same method can be applied to your naughty bits on a very cold descent. Sure, its not comfortable, but you can remove it and tuck it in your friends pocket after you descend, and feeling uncomfortable is better than getting so cold they go numb.

Clif wrappers are also excellent for keeping your shit clean.  We here at Roadie Review do NOT advise cleaning up from a 3 point road stop with Clif wrappers, but they are excellent for any time you have to touch your chain and don't want to get grease all over (words of wisdom, if your gloves are black, that does NOT mean they cannot become dirty and might explain why your white handlebars are no longer white)


Clif wrappers are not better than the products these uses substitute--though I cannot say anything about the wrapper bags.  I would much prefer a new tire over a Clif boot, and I would eat a Pearson's salted nut roll before any Clif bar.  But, every $2 bar is essentially a disposable multi-tool, and because each package has so many uses, it earns some respect in our teams eyes.

Pros:
Cheap, if not free.
Versatile
Disposable

Cons:
Contents not as tasty as a salted nut roll

5/5 Salted Nut Rolls

First Impressions: Bontrager RXL All-Weather Beard

We at Roadie Review were VERY excited to get our hands on this newest product drop from Bontrager just in time for the cold, nasty Midwest winter that those in Waterloo must be accustomed to.  The new RXL A-W Beard is by no means a replacement for your -20C balaclava, nor is it to be worn year-round, but is ideal for those times of the year when normal people ride bikes outside (or at least by cycling culture's standard), cyclocross, and even day-to-day use.

The premise behind the beard is excellent in its simplicity: a product to cover the part of your body that faces the wind the most--except the nose, although the R&D team at Bontrager mentioned difficulty in blending comfort with coverage(2013 models)? The RXL A-W B is not water proof, though it does block the wind well and offers some minor insulation. What the Beard lacks in warmth, it makes up for in versatility, and aesthetics.  Our review staff could not stop gaping over the unique blend of material and texture the Beard offered, as many staffers immediately started rethinking their entire wardrobes around it. Though it might seem peculiar to say about a soft good, the installation was a lengthy process taking some of our less experience staffers as many as 6 weeks, and removal was a pain (literally!) even for seasoned veterans.

Reps from Bontrager say the Beard represents a watershed improvement from the previous generation's RL Moustache, and is designed to work best in conjunction with the Upcoming SSR Chesthair. For now, we're excited to put some miles in with this new product, and provide a full review in the weeks to come!